"I will honor Christmas in my heart and try to keep it all the year."--Ebenezer Scrooge
We went Christmas shopping today, Steve and I. This is probably the first year in many that we have gone together. We really wanted to have the Christmas spirit. We really did. We actually started out pretty good. We drove down to the office so that Steve could pull off Shane's Christmas list from his email while I sent out a few more Christmas cards. We cashed my bonus check (thanks John Henry Smith--you rock!). We drove over to see Dennis at the (secret) store (don't want to give any surprises away!) and bought a present and then headed for the freeway. Do we take the north on-ramp and go to Layton Hills Mall or the south on-ramp and go down to Fashion Place? One has a great Macy's store, the other has Dillards and Nordys. Ahhh, south it is. Besides, we needed to check on something for Madi's gift at the (secret--shhh) store. But first, a stop at Hire's Big H for sustenance (two orders of Big H combo, extra crispy fries--burnt if you can, please-vanilla diet coke and onion rings. MMMMMM!) So far so good. The Christmas carols are playing on the radio, we have full tummys and we are juiced up on diet cokes. As we head down to Fashion Place, we find ourselves near a store that Steve remembered, and knew he could get Shane's gift there. Excellent. While he is in looking at boy stuff (YAWN) I walk into the neighboring nail salon--maybe I can get a quick manicure. They don't have time to fit me in that day, but no problem--I found a cute necklace to buy while I was there and had a nice conversation with the front desk lady about my gorgeous scarf that Jody brought back for me from Paris (thanks, Jody--you are the most awesome friend, especially because you now wish you kept this scarf for yourself). Steve and I met back up. We add Shane's gift to our growing stash of loot. I am feeling very accomplished. As we drive over to the the mall, we see stand-still traffic from the side streets just trying to get IN the parking lot. Yikes! Hmmm, do we really want to go to this mall? It looks like a mad house, and we haven't even parked yet. Well, we are all ready there, so I suggest parking in a neighboring business parking lot and just walking a little. It's not snowing, the roads are clear. This is fun. As we enter Dillards and walk out into the mall, we are literally SHOULDER TO SHOULDER with a mass of humanity. The stores we need to go to have 10 minute waiting lines just to check out. Steve's eyes start to glaze over. My eyes start to glaze over. The diet coke is slowing failing us as the crowds of people, the piles of STUFF, and the limited choices in the specific items we are looking for begin to sap our strength. We buy some things, and I am feeling like we are done, but we want to make sure we have what we need before we leave. I quickly calculate what I have so far for each daughter--who needs a little something more so everything is even? Since I have been paying cash for everything today, I made a quick calculation of what we have bought, and subtract from the amount I started with and realize with a horrible pit in my stomach that I am off by about $40. What?! I re-add the figures, but it is hard to focus with the rising panic and the jostling crowd and the noise. The Christmas spirit has flown, just that fast. I want to start crying--I am sorry, but $40 is a LOT of money to me. I quickly review what I am short, and how I paid for everything at each stop and conclude that it is possible that I may have given the lady at the nail place a $50 instead of a $20 for my purchase--that would explain the difference that I am short. Steve patiently and quietly tries to subdue my panic as we walk out of the mall and drive back to the nail store. He tells me of the time he accidentally left about $400 in a rental car when he turned it in, but when he realized his mistake and went immediately back to get it, it was gone. I start trying to tell myself that it was only $40, but still!! I am breaking down by the millisecond, and my cute husband, in an effort to save the day, pulls out his wallet and offers to give me the money. But no, I really wanted to pay for these things from the money I earned. The nail store had done their deposit for the day, and they were not over by $40, and there was no $50 bill in the cash to be deposited anyway. What more can you do? So we drove back home quietly dejected, yet trying to get back in the Christmas mood. At home we found the kind of mess you'd expect from kids being home all day without mom and dad--not horrible, but still a mess that I really didn't want to deal with. We put on Christmas music, started cleaning up, worked on putting together all the the Young Women Christmas gifts for tomorrow, visited with the girls and their friends, and finally closed up the house for the night at 12:30 AM. As Steve and I lay in bed together and reviewed the day, we--meaning he--came up with a beautiful analogy: life is just like running a marathon, there can only be one person in front and there is, unfortunately, also one person who is last, but the majority of us are right in the middle. I think that means that, while I am running around trying to have Christmas cheer, or a clean house, or hoping/wanting my kids to do what they are asked to do, that I should not fall apart when it doesn't all come together the way that I think it should. We all just plug along at a steady pace as we work towards the finish line. Sometimes we pass people and sometimes they pass us, but that doesn't (or shouldn't) matter, as long as we keep moving forward. So, thank you sweet Steven, for once more being the voice of reasoning and calmness in my life. Thank you for bringing me back to where I need to be. I love you, you know.
This was a long, round about way to say that I totally understand Ebeneezer Scrooge. He forgot that we have to go steadily forward, doing the best we can, loving each other, forgiving each other. He needed someone to remind him of that (just like I did yesterday) Once he remembered his blessings and the people and experiences in his life that blessed him, he was able to refocus on what was important: the business of mankind.
Oh, and the $40? This morning when I woke up, I was still bugged by that, so I went through the receipts AGAIN and found that I had indeed miscalculated. I still have the same amount of money left that I had last night, but it is all accounted for. The universe is once again in alignment.
We went Christmas shopping today, Steve and I. This is probably the first year in many that we have gone together. We really wanted to have the Christmas spirit. We really did. We actually started out pretty good. We drove down to the office so that Steve could pull off Shane's Christmas list from his email while I sent out a few more Christmas cards. We cashed my bonus check (thanks John Henry Smith--you rock!). We drove over to see Dennis at the (secret) store (don't want to give any surprises away!) and bought a present and then headed for the freeway. Do we take the north on-ramp and go to Layton Hills Mall or the south on-ramp and go down to Fashion Place? One has a great Macy's store, the other has Dillards and Nordys. Ahhh, south it is. Besides, we needed to check on something for Madi's gift at the (secret--shhh) store. But first, a stop at Hire's Big H for sustenance (two orders of Big H combo, extra crispy fries--burnt if you can, please-vanilla diet coke and onion rings. MMMMMM!) So far so good. The Christmas carols are playing on the radio, we have full tummys and we are juiced up on diet cokes. As we head down to Fashion Place, we find ourselves near a store that Steve remembered, and knew he could get Shane's gift there. Excellent. While he is in looking at boy stuff (YAWN) I walk into the neighboring nail salon--maybe I can get a quick manicure. They don't have time to fit me in that day, but no problem--I found a cute necklace to buy while I was there and had a nice conversation with the front desk lady about my gorgeous scarf that Jody brought back for me from Paris (thanks, Jody--you are the most awesome friend, especially because you now wish you kept this scarf for yourself). Steve and I met back up. We add Shane's gift to our growing stash of loot. I am feeling very accomplished. As we drive over to the the mall, we see stand-still traffic from the side streets just trying to get IN the parking lot. Yikes! Hmmm, do we really want to go to this mall? It looks like a mad house, and we haven't even parked yet. Well, we are all ready there, so I suggest parking in a neighboring business parking lot and just walking a little. It's not snowing, the roads are clear. This is fun. As we enter Dillards and walk out into the mall, we are literally SHOULDER TO SHOULDER with a mass of humanity. The stores we need to go to have 10 minute waiting lines just to check out. Steve's eyes start to glaze over. My eyes start to glaze over. The diet coke is slowing failing us as the crowds of people, the piles of STUFF, and the limited choices in the specific items we are looking for begin to sap our strength. We buy some things, and I am feeling like we are done, but we want to make sure we have what we need before we leave. I quickly calculate what I have so far for each daughter--who needs a little something more so everything is even? Since I have been paying cash for everything today, I made a quick calculation of what we have bought, and subtract from the amount I started with and realize with a horrible pit in my stomach that I am off by about $40. What?! I re-add the figures, but it is hard to focus with the rising panic and the jostling crowd and the noise. The Christmas spirit has flown, just that fast. I want to start crying--I am sorry, but $40 is a LOT of money to me. I quickly review what I am short, and how I paid for everything at each stop and conclude that it is possible that I may have given the lady at the nail place a $50 instead of a $20 for my purchase--that would explain the difference that I am short. Steve patiently and quietly tries to subdue my panic as we walk out of the mall and drive back to the nail store. He tells me of the time he accidentally left about $400 in a rental car when he turned it in, but when he realized his mistake and went immediately back to get it, it was gone. I start trying to tell myself that it was only $40, but still!! I am breaking down by the millisecond, and my cute husband, in an effort to save the day, pulls out his wallet and offers to give me the money. But no, I really wanted to pay for these things from the money I earned. The nail store had done their deposit for the day, and they were not over by $40, and there was no $50 bill in the cash to be deposited anyway. What more can you do? So we drove back home quietly dejected, yet trying to get back in the Christmas mood. At home we found the kind of mess you'd expect from kids being home all day without mom and dad--not horrible, but still a mess that I really didn't want to deal with. We put on Christmas music, started cleaning up, worked on putting together all the the Young Women Christmas gifts for tomorrow, visited with the girls and their friends, and finally closed up the house for the night at 12:30 AM. As Steve and I lay in bed together and reviewed the day, we--meaning he--came up with a beautiful analogy: life is just like running a marathon, there can only be one person in front and there is, unfortunately, also one person who is last, but the majority of us are right in the middle. I think that means that, while I am running around trying to have Christmas cheer, or a clean house, or hoping/wanting my kids to do what they are asked to do, that I should not fall apart when it doesn't all come together the way that I think it should. We all just plug along at a steady pace as we work towards the finish line. Sometimes we pass people and sometimes they pass us, but that doesn't (or shouldn't) matter, as long as we keep moving forward. So, thank you sweet Steven, for once more being the voice of reasoning and calmness in my life. Thank you for bringing me back to where I need to be. I love you, you know.
This was a long, round about way to say that I totally understand Ebeneezer Scrooge. He forgot that we have to go steadily forward, doing the best we can, loving each other, forgiving each other. He needed someone to remind him of that (just like I did yesterday) Once he remembered his blessings and the people and experiences in his life that blessed him, he was able to refocus on what was important: the business of mankind.
Oh, and the $40? This morning when I woke up, I was still bugged by that, so I went through the receipts AGAIN and found that I had indeed miscalculated. I still have the same amount of money left that I had last night, but it is all accounted for. The universe is once again in alignment.
