Sigh
I got up early this morning and went to the Bountiful LDS Temple with Jody, came home and saw Madi off to her all day babysitting job. I made sure Ashley completed her tasks for the day (room and flute) and then saw HER off to an all day babysitting job. I saw Steve for a quick minute when he came home from work to grab a forgotten phone, and then he was gone and then I was all....alone. What to do, what to do? I did not have a current project to work on. I didn't feel like reading. My house is pretty much clean, but I was not in the mood to tackle the few "junk spots." I ran some errands, but still came back home to an empty house. I have always fantasized about an empty house and all things I would accomplish and get to do, but I find it very...lonely. Even for a few hours. I miss Kelsey. I miss Markelle. Their independence is still so new that they haven't come running to me for advice. I am sad at how fast they grew up, and at how fast Madi and Ashley are growing up. Madi and Ashley are all about friends and boys and clothes. Not mom. This is a very weird in-between state to be in. Is it time to get a full time job? No, not yet, because Madi and Ashley are still at that vulnerable time of life. Do I pursue some of my secret passions: more schooling, quilt making, visiting Mt. Rushmore, working at the Humanitarian Center? Almost there. How do other women handle this time in their life? What would THEY have done with a few hours of unexpected alone time?
